i agree with the previous review...the last two stanzas are horribly hackneyed and choppy and there are multiple spelling and grammar errors. you fall way short of creating the "intoxicating effect" you were looking for. try using more unique imagery...don't just say the perfume is sexy, describe what sexy is to you. does it smell like maple syrup and vanilla? dying roses? wet dog? month old fungus coated gym socks? also use more figures of speech and try not to say things directly - that gives a more "kiddy" quality to it. don't just say "i can't control myself" - what does that mean? describe the emotional/psychological/and physiological effects...break apart the feeling into its basic components. you have a framework. now build. make it original.

It started well. If I'm honest, I don't like the last two stanzas, the penultimate one especially. It doesn't appear to have been proof read and if it's intentionally written that way than it's near impossible to make either head or tail of it. Also don't like the use of "sexy" to describe perfume. It's not an adjective I'd use to describe it.

Aside from that, it is good. Expresses the feeling of helplessness quite well, it's mostly well structured and I like very much the idea of drowning in romance (like the way you're not using "love".

Not bad.

Matt