The idea of someone being...literally left crushed underneath the vehicle is kind of grotesque. Extremely kind of grotesque. When I first read this, until you overtly suggested that your main character was a blond boy, I assumed it was a girl. Ok, I assumed it was you. Seeing as how you haven't been annihilated under skidmarked rubber though, I guess I was wrong. Sadly. Nay, I jest.

Your character is also overtly gay. Well disguised Nav, well disguised. I'm not sure where I stand on the constant repetition of onomatopoeic noises, but I'm not unhappy with the. So it's all good. There were a couple of apostrophe abuses in here, but as this was written some time ago, and they're really quite minor, I won't ** you out about them too much. I liked the bit with the disapproving mother. Elle est cool.

All these things aside: pas mechant, Nav, pas mechant.

I like it. A lot.

Nice use of onomatopeias and the pattern set between lines. The ending is slightly hard to believe however, given the character, who is seemingly a child and/or teenager running an errand for her mother. I can't imagine the character, "smiling in irony" as her ribcage has just been crushed and her respiratory system permanently damaged as you have not hinted that she was suicidal or...geared towards "smiling" while in the clutches of death. However, nicely executed ended, with once again the included onomatopeia was that gave the whole ending a nice sense of relation to the entire piece.

Huh :tilts head to the side thoughtfully: i like it. i'm going to be saying plop plop swirl plop plop for the next 24 hours but i liked it. i can't wait to read something else of yours