|Reviews for The Smallest Elephant|
| although 12/30/09 . chapter 25
When I started reading this story, I expected it to be like most of the angsty stories on here: mildly angsty and then Keegan ends up with one of them and the other one gets really hurt and they stop being friends (I was rooting for Skeezie since the introductions), but the whole ending is pretty happy and only a little bitter sweet.
And then there was the anorexia, and then Keegan kept digging his hole deeper and deeper, and then the whole scene with the English teacher, and then the ending was perfect. The whole story was perfect. It was unfulfilling and there was absolutely no resolution and it was great. It made me sob. I haven't sobbed for a fictional character since I was 8 and Beth died in Little Women.
I'm so glad you didn't listen to any of the other reviewers and make an epilogue. Because this story is perfect. Unresolved endings are the very best kind of ending, and you did a very good job of going about that, and you're an amazing writer, and Jesus Christ, you made me sob.
| NoHornCorn 12/27/09 . chapter 25
I knew that one of the characters were going to die. I just thought it would be Skeezie. :( It was really good!
| Me 12/23/09 . chapter 25
I don't think I've ever read a story that made me cry so much, but it's really good. :(
| Angels-obsession 9/22/09 . chapter 25
Now for a mega review of DOOM! I just finished reading this, and I'm very emotional right now! lol :P Only the extremely, absolutely amazing, genius, gorgeously written stories such as this one can do that.
I hate stories that end like this, it lacks a sense of closure.
That being said.. it truly was so beautifully written. I'm not trying to give this unconditional praise or anything, because it does have it's kinks and rough patches, like all stories do. However, the emotion of it overshadows anything else. I read this story constantly in an emotional state, unfortunately, that was one of sadness most of the time. I get really invested into stories like yours, and it was really painful to read the ending. Not because it was badly written or anything, it's just because it practically made my heart bleed to know that it was implied that Keegan shot himself. That at such a young age he had no reason enough for himself to keep going. It's a fictional story, but when I was reading it, it might as well have been ME feeling the way he did. I was really into this story, lol!
Like I said, I hate character death. Absolutely hate. I dunno if you warned for it, but if you did I defiantly missed it. I always skip the character death stories. They just kill me! lol
Though, I really wouldn't want you to end it any other way. It's how you visioned it from the start. When I write I never keep the same ending I start with, but I understand that it was what you were set on doing. It works.
On with the characters..I didn't really get the feeling of knowing with the rest of the 'gang.' I was totally focused on the 'love triangle.' They were really the only characters I cared about, which is fine because the story was really about them. Though I must admit, I had a soft spot for Daniel. I'd like to see more of his story! _ I dunno why I like him so much. haha
I could sense that Skeezie was truly in love, and I really hoped that somehow Keegan would realize feelings for him deeper than what he thought, or something! You could just kind of tell that 'miah wasn't in love with Keegan. Not to mention that 'miah had a whole wealth of problems he needed to deal with... anyway!
Random thought: I really liked the part of the TSE story where the peacock unzipped it's costume to reveal a snake. It was such a vivid image in my mind.
I also thought a few times that Keegan was only in 10th grade, he shouldn't be having to deal with such serious relationships! It's too damn bad he "apparently" committed suicide. I say apparently because I'd like to think that, in my own little world, he just wrote that TSE shot himself as his ending for that english assignment as a metaphor for letting go of his problems.(and no one will tell me different damnit! T_T) Not that he actually did kill himself. Then I can picture him growing up and, experiencing love again and getting all old and shit! :) That makes me feel loads better! haha
I thought Keegan's story was beautiful, and tragic. I agree with most of your other readers. It would be nice to have an epilogue, something to give more closure. Also, maybe even a side story of how the other characters move on from this. Or a side story about 'miah's brother :B asdjfals, sorry just expressing my random love for him. :P
Anywho, this is one of my most favorite stories. Like, where only a select few reside... It's one I wont forget easily. Thank you so much for writing it and sharing!
Also, sorry if half of this makes no sense- it was kind of late (for me anyway) when I wrote it. The kind of late where all the words start to blur together... _
| abbsi 9/7/09 . chapter 25
It made me cry. :( Well written. can't hate, but, made me cry. And yes, i could see that Nehemiah didn't/wouldn't love him for most of the story.
| BelieveIt 8/26/09 . chapter 25
This story took my breath away, it was extremely well written and had me clinging to every detail and everything was so life like. i really did love it, although it still would have been lovely if everything got sorted out and Keegan ended up with 'a happy ever after' with one of the boys, the ending was so effective, and i think that was the best ending you could have done. i think i actually nearly cried, because i could feel the emotion. you're really talented. are you planning or thinking about possibly making a sequel or maybe even an epilogue in the point of view of Nehemiah or Skyler or even both? anyway really good on this story, this is one i will surely be re-reading.
| Seeker of Knowledge 7/30/09 . chapter 25
you have a gift: there's so much emotion packed in this and i really connected with the characters, poor Skeez X(
. the ending was absolutely brilliant and reduced me to tears
never stop writing
() Eleri (
| plushdeath 7/17/09 . chapter 1
just wanted to say that this is probably my favorite story, it made me cry my eyes out.
| DarkSacrifice 6/28/09 . chapter 25
Omg, how sad, how could he be so stupid to cheat, grraarrgg!
I love the ending,but can't you make atleast a last chapter to let us know how the others are dealing with keagan's death?
This story teaches us to embrace the love we get...you have to cherish it...because before you know it...it can be taken away..
I love this story...trully amazing...and very sad...*sigh*
he had it all...and he lost it so fast...
Thank you very much for sharing this story ...thankyou! I loved reading it..!
| lalaland22 6/24/09 . chapter 25
Wow! u ended this story perfectly...u had such an origianl plot and although u used a cliche love triangle, u certainly ened the story as original and unique as u started it; i certainly didnt see it coming. The way u incorporated his chapter story into his own life was really creative. (his chapter story about the elephant was amazing i dont think i could've written something that creative) It really added another element to this story.
BTW- i'm still confused about Miah's secrets...i get Skeezie's secret, Oh and i wonder if Mr. Kepler liked his story...i hope the bastard felt bad about how he treated Keegan.
Major, major kudos! (i love a good angsty story, im not saying that im emo and love when ppl kill themselves but sometimes its needed to show the deeper meaning behind the story, which was to appreciate the ppl that care about u b/c some ppl dont have that. ) I feel really stupid b/c i take a lot of things for granted that i shouldnt :(
| lalaland22 6/24/09 . chapter 21
I adore your story, i really do but i think its absolutley horrible the Skeezie is being used the way he is. Just b/c Keegan has had a pretty sucky life that doesnt mean that its okay to mess around with someones mind like that. Plus, as much as i love Miah, i love Skeezie more...i dont think Miah appreciates keegan as much.
Although i love your story it really did dissapoint me that u used what i like to call the "cliche love triangle", just b/c i think your story was soo original and the fact that u kinda took the easy way out just hurt my :(
I just hope the ending wont dissapoint me b/c i hate when i can guess how a story will end, i liked to be suprised
BTW- i know this is late but my blessings go to your brother
| honey splattered brains 6/23/09 . chapter 2
AWS poor keegan D: it makes me want to hug himm
| AlwaysTheNegativeOptimist 5/27/09 . chapter 25
I read this story so many times... I cry everytime I do. It's just so touching and so good... Even the sheer memory makes me want to cry. I love this story...
| lazyxhime 5/24/09 . chapter 25
Oh my god.
I cried so much. I was so overwhelmed by emotion while reading this and I don't think I will ever forget reading this. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to read it.
| Rakuda 5/3/09 . chapter 25
Hey. This story pretty much drilled a hole into my heart. You ever read Perks of Being a Wallflower? Well, your fic reminded me very much of the mood of that one poem in there, as well as Charlie's character. A nice blend of the two, like a milkshake. But this is more heartbreaking. I'm...I was so so so so so so so so so hoping that Nehemiah would pull through, but no. I wasn't much for Skye but he did end up filling Keegan's life a bit with happiness...I just feel so sad, so sad. I went through a bout with anorexia in the past, and Keegan's self-hate on that front was pretty much what I felt as well, thanks for keeping it real. Thanks for writing this story and for not tying it up in a pretty bow. You have a nice, clear style, I managed to connect to your characters, especially Keegan. Who was there for Keegan? No one. He was backed into a corner. Some things just can't be worked out if there's no one you can trust in. I felt sorry for Keegan, and grateful for the support I have in my family, friends, and religion. Some people don't have these privileges and my heart goes out to them. Thank you for letting me realize that...All the best.