|Reviews for Red|
| Bloodsinger 6/25/06 . chapter 1
The repetition of "Clever rogue" works very nicely. Your words fit so well together, I can never understand how you can have such a command over the language.
"They bury you with insincerity."
"My low born hero"
"Your silver tongue your only treasure."
Just some of my favorite lines.
| Bananas in a Blender 6/15/06 . chapter 1
Cool, you updated. The grammar for this piece seemed a bit last stanza has quotes around the last exchange, but not the first.I liked the idea of this poem; it really shines through, especially with the lines,"Teach me that tune;Which changes any line to musicOne song enough for all of us."Some other minor grammar errors, like:"And smile flashing, use them" I think there should be another comma after 'And.'"My low born hero" My low-born heroAnd I don't think there should be a semicolon after 'tune.'I think that's all. "A teller of falsehoods but no false friends." I like that line. ;)I was a bit confused as to why you titled this piece "Red," but I'll ask you about that later.