Looking back to your first and so chapters your writing has really improved –applause- be happy and yes, this was a great chapter….. oh, fun, fencing

TAD

Oh, really good chapter... got a little confused for a bit, but got back on track. And i missed this chapter in my absence from the internet so i will review both... i kinda was banned and not allowed to review... -laughs- well nyway, great chapter!

TAD

Good chapter. I actually wasn't expectin anotha HW chapter so soon. I thought anotha GD chapter would be out first. Finally, action is bein against the mysterious stalker or stalkers... interestin plot development. I liked how Spencer planned everythin like a leader. Can't wait for ch.13 to come.

I saw a few errors.

“If that’s true, then you need to learn how to count,” Lyle said to Virgil, jumping out of Roski’s way to avoid having his foot crushed by the CHAR.

Chair.

“Hey …! Watch it!” Spencer protested when some of the rice landed on his lap. He was sitting next to Ryuki and unintentionally in Jongsoo’s line of fire

Nothin wrong here, ya just forgot a period at the end.

Virgil amused grin at Kaneaki’s and Ryuki’s actions disappeared

Virgil’s

When Spencer realized that everyone else staring at him openmouthed, he queried, “What?”

Forgot ‘was’ after ‘else’

“Don’t worry, I’LL all for it!” Sergio cracked his knuckles.

I’m

Make sure you don’t SEEN too obvious.”

Seem.

Now, my favorite parts in this chapter.

“Sure!” Ryeja snatched the rice bowl with his right hand and slammed it down in front of Jongsoo, accidentally sending a few grains of cooked rice flying on himself, Jongsoo, and everyone else at the table.

“Ah! Stop doing that!” Spencer moaned, annoyed that he was getting sprayed with rice that morning so much.

“Ryeja, what’d I tell you about that?” Virgil growled at him.

“Uhh … not to do it?” Ryeja scratched the back of his head nervously, not liking where the conversation was going.

Lol.

-

“Oh, right,” and turned to Ryuki. “Hey, Ryuki, leave.”

“Iie!” Ryuki shouted back at him. “I do not want to!”

“Too bad, because I say that you are leaving!” Kaneaki retorted, picking Ryuki up effortlessly and carrying him out of the kitchen.

“Put me down!” Ryuki flailed and thrashed around, trying to break out of Kaneaki’s grip.

“Stop doing that, you are going to make me drop you and you will get brain damage,” Kaneaki said calmly as he walked upstairs with his younger and shorter friend.

lol.

-

“Great!” Spencer instructed Kaneaki and Jongsoo, “That is where you guys come in. You two will basically get on the roof and do whatever you can to scare the stalkers away!”

“Eh?” Jongsoo had a dazed expression on his face as he asked Spencer, “So let me get this straight. That’s your brilliant plan? Just scare them away from on top of the roof?”

“Oh, and try to avoid being seen too,” Spencer added.

Lmao.

-

Spencer nodded and turned to Israel and Willow. “You guys have a pretty risky part in the plan.”

“Oh, goody,” Willow muttered to herself sarcastically.

Willow’s response was priceless as I can imagine the dull look on her face. lol.

-

“Ryeja, you have to be the lookout for Willow and Israel,” Spencer replied, giving the Japanese-Korean a serious look. “Make sure that the coast is clear for them and if the two blow their cover somehow, you need to distract the stalkers so they don’t discover them. Make sure you don’t seem too obvious.”

The idea of Ryeja bein a distraction if Willow and Israel is spotted is hilarious as I know he’ll do somethin stupid.

-

“Hey, wait, what are you going to do?” Willow asked Spencer just then, realizing that he didn’t have a role in the plan.

“Glad you asked,” Spencer answered. “I’m going to be distracting Ryuki and Yuri from what we’re doing. Somebody has to do it!”

“Good luck!” Kaneaki rolled his eyes. “You might have the hardest part of us all! Ryuki is insane! He will try to find out what we are doing!”

lol, glad luck is right. I can’t see Spencer distractin Ryuki for too long, but at least he ain’t gotta distract Ryuki and Ember. 0_0 (lol, thank god she left as that mission would be impossible.)

-

Spencer sighed crossly. “Fencing competition is so not worth this.”

Lol, nice end quote.

Again, can't wait for ch.13 to come out! good job, buddy.

man... you skipped the snowboard trip (that coulda actually been fun to read instead of just hearin them talk about what happened.).

I only saw one error.

Ember popped out of the kitchen just then, balancing a wooden bowl on her HAND and holding a wooden spoon in her left hand.

You meant balancin the wooden bowl on her head.

yea... 29 people is way too many... and 9pm ain't late. I dunno anyone around my area that wants ta sleep at 9pm. More like 1am.

chapter's weird as usual.

I loved the quote that Virgil said.

Virgil: Whoever you are, just shut up!

RAOFLMAO! That was one of the funniest quotes I heard from this story yet.! XD And yay, Hayden's back. :p

hey. i ain't actually left a comment for a while (even though you know I been readin all the chapters.). Ch.10 actually wasn't as bad as you made it sound. You made it sound like it would just be this dull script-like chapter, but stuff did happen.

I was expectin them to just talk without ANY kind of action goin on. It was weird how they started talkin bout bein Asians later on in the chapter. Kinda sounded like some random lesson on... well... just bein Asian I guess. XD

It was a lot betta than I expected, and very random... lol. good job. This was the first chapter that ain't had the most important main character (Ryuji) in it.

Do you have to have me to tell you it's good? Well it was really good and i encourage you on. update soon!

TAD

Heyhey

I've been reading this story and so far it's been pretty interesting (I havn't found any Korean oriented stories on before, let along any that are partially set in my hometown). Ryuji is a pretty annoying, enough to make me want to hit him. But that's a good thing when you're writing, because it makes him very realistic.

I'm curious, do you live in Korea or Canada? because I have to point out one little error: Whistler is nearly a three and a half-hour drive from Vancouver International Airport up the Sea-to-Sky highway. It's a long trip and Whistler is little more than a village during the off-season.

Anyhoo, I will go back to reading the story now! I'll review again when I finish.

It was a hilarious hapter! Really good job with this!

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*

He just stared in disbelief? Okay. That's probably what i woulda done lol. Good chapter, keep going!

*TAD*

Ryeja moaned. “I think I just stepped into the nuthouse.”

That line, I think, just made my day. I know it was the last line, but it was a great capper.

That was great. So this is the last chapter as of current. A very nice chapter. Plz update soon!

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*

Unexpected visitor, now who could it be? Yes, so, i will keep reading, i like ow you have a cliffe here, it makes you want to keep reading. Thanks ...

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*

oy, a mysterious stranger. um, that's never a good thing in my veiw. Ryuji (Ryeja... why'd he change his name...?) had to leave with Jongsoo. So yes, will continue, but this seemed somewhat of an ending right now, with mostly everything closed... so yes... very nice.

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*

Eerily silent? And when haven't i seen that before? (every other second of my life) so yes, I believe this was a good chapter, though still the one before i liked better. Very nice!

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*

I love you comments. It's very like what peopl say in real life. Tha is partially what keeps me hooked, the dialogue all by itself. Overall another very good chapter. I love where this story is going.

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*

I love the names that you use. Very original. I like the end part. It was very amusing . Thank you for this chapter!

*TAD/Phoenix Keeper*