Reviews for The Decision Game

Reviews For: The Decision Game

steev 2006-10-27 ch 1,	abuse1st- srry for the delay in response. I've been busy, for various reasons. It's sort of a taboo to critique how someone rights (opposed to their poetry itself), but I don't care. Now, the persistent problem with the majority of your work (or, at the least, all that I've read) is that you write from the perspective of the "I" pronoun- the 1st person narrator. This is a problem in that you use it in such a way that your stuff either reads like diary entries or personal rants (as here, esp. with the accusations towards "you"), & use various nouns that become abstract to the reader due to them having no possible way to put things into a context. To restate, a large amount of the problems with your poetry stem from this. Try writing some poems without "I", or especially without "I" meaning you. Realize that your poetry is not you, & vice-versa; that's merely a false justification for catharsis or the smothering "self-expression" that excludes a reader. I think this advice could be more helpful to you as a writer than ripping apart a single poem.
Princess-anna57 2006-07-02 ch 1,	abuseI really adore the messages your poems convey. Excellent! Write on! ~Anna~ ^_^
Sakina the Fallen Angel 2006-06-26 ch 1,	abuseSpiritual...yet modern...especially with the 'game over' ending :p which brought it down to earth. Loved this poem. Sakina x
With Rhyme and Reason 2006-06-26 ch 1,	abuse"Are we the products of our parents or our past?" Nice line, by the way. Are we feeling a bit peer-pressured? That's what I picked up from this: "Should I smoke the joint or not?" Nice imagery with the black and white mountains, and the mention that indecision can kill a person. Nice, nice, nice. However, this isn't my favorite piece of yours. No offense... it just lacked a certain pizzaz (oh, God, I have no idea how to spell that) that your other poems have. I must ask about your name. One of my majors is Latin, so when I saw it I naturally thought something like "Death Causing Love Ghost". But seriously, Mortifer, what does it mean? Julie
Midnight Star Lights 2006-06-21 ch 1,	abuseThis is deep & beautiful at the same time. I really enjoyed reading this.Keep it up! WINKS :P

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