Knowing about the experience you're referring to, I really come to this poem ridiculously biased with my personal judgment of the experience. On the one hand, I can sorta better understand your viewpoint of it. At the same time, though, I don't know if there's enough here to make me fully appreciate why you did what you did and how you evaluated the event afterwards. I totally understand if you want to keep it ambiguous since the whole world doesn't need to know about your personal life and since a little mystery often does wonders for literature. However, the poem might be a little better if you took a stronger tone, away from being just shocked, to one that actually evaluates and analyzes the situation.

Granted, this poem was written quite a while ago, right after the event, and it's unreasonable to expect anyone to have a cohesive response so shortly afterwards. At this later date, though, perhaps you have some more insight you could work into this poem or into another one or maybe into a vignette or something.

I hope you like my first ever review on FP!

Hm... Okay, I didn't love it. But I didn't hate it, either. Ha, I guess we're getting somewhere. I thought your language was a little colloquial for poetry. I'm not saying that everything needs to be "thee", "thou", and "thy"--it just sounds like you're talking to one of your friends.

The theme you have going, though, is very nice. I'm sensing a "loss of innocence" tone that really fascinates me. You kind of miss an opportunity to really elaborate on it, though. That is, you spen a lot of words on asking questions like "Should I feel tainted, wasted?" and "Was it all right / To let him hold me?" The former was one of the better lines (the one about feeling "tainted"). But you don't answer these questions. The answers would give you an excellent opportunity to lapse into metaphorical and imaginative arguments.

It seems like this was an autobiographical poem, so please understand that my criticism is not about you or your experience, but rather how you portrayed that experience. The loss of innocence can be beautiful or horrible or both. You have a perfect balance here. But when I was done with the poem, I felt that you were still indecisive. I might suggest making it longer and answering (in depth) some of those question you ask. This poem has potential, and I'm not just saying that to be nice.

If you feel I'm being mean, stupid, or unfair (or all three of those adjectives), feel free to send me an e-mail. Also, if you want me to clarify something, send an e-mail.

Julie (With Rhyme and Reason)