I love the idea of the middle line in the second paragraph: "Your like every disease that oozes out every poor"

The beginning is rather to my tastes too. And I'm always ** about rhyming, so, "See, the lines rhyme just to make sure that this will hurt you.." is as well.

ANNA

Well, I liked this. I thought the rhyming was tastefull and you chose the right words. Good work!

Interesting. Nice vocabulary, but re-spell a bunch of words and check grammar: "Let's start from the top; a bit melodramatic [...] far too problematic [...]" and so on.