FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Warg 2006-08-13 ch 1,  | abuseHey.. It is the end here that leaves the poem completed. Somehow, the first verses were slightly lacking, maybe thats the longing instilled in the stanza that seeped into the wording.. Good work all the same. ^__^ .. |
| a lonely september 2006-07-14 ch 1, | abusei love the whole second part, it's freakin incredible. i love it. it's so pretty. 'stars in my eyes' 'sweet darkness' 'glimmering bits of brightness' 'velvet, empty air' 'my eyes, your eyes, locked together' . . .damn, it's just so pretty. amazing job. |
| Femme de Dieu 2006-07-02 ch 1, | abuseI do like it. I like the repitition at the end the most. "I'm here. Right now, I'm here / Right now. You...and me." Very nice. What is the meaning behind the mixed straight and italic print and underlining on the word "locked?" Was that so it would be read lock-ed? That one word gave me pause as it interrupted the flow of the piece for me. But otherwise, very nice. |