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| Dexterity 2008-01-28 ch 1,  | abuseWow, that was great! I don't think you made it sound like you don't believe in religions at all, but you've pinpointed the root of the problem: that is, people are using humans as symbols for various religions and ignoring the initial teachings. They think that going to church, or temple, or whatever, doing some rituals improvised by humans, is faith when it really isn't. I think you captured the idea very well. Just one little thing that I caught: You spelled worship as warship in the second to last stanza. That's all! Keep writing! |
| Twilight Starr 2007-10-27 ch 1, | abuseI actually completely get and agree with this poem/story. People don't right out try and convert me, but they try sometimes. My mom likes to believe I'm her religion. My dad doesn't care (his religion is different than my mom's) as long as I respect other people's religions. I try to respect everyone's beliefs, but I get annoyed when people try to convert others or they use their religion as a "weapon". Great job! Good luck with writing, poetry, this problem, and life. Have a wonderful day. ~Twilight Starr~ |
| Dani P 2007-10-19 ch 1, | abusei get it you dont hafta go to church or believe in organized relgion to love god. the message is great, however, how you said you're message was a little plain and for me..to obvious. i would use language to emphasis you're piece..this seems too ordinary. keep playing around with word choice etc..and you'll get there |
| elcaminojoe 2007-10-11 ch 1, | abuseNow wether or not i'm on the right track, I don't know, but this to me sounds like you are agnostic. Well, as I read it, that's what I was imagining. Because I am not religious in the slightest. But that doesn't mean that I don't believe in anything. I really like this, could actually imagine some of my own experiences. especially at the lines "The question: So do you go to church? Makes me CRINGE, I answer with a smug no and the drama begins." SO awesome. Keep expressing yourself, wether people agree or not. It's always worth it. |
| soojinyeh 2007-10-10 ch 1, | abuseI know what you mean. I feel the same way... i have a song called Dear God I wrote, you can hear it on my myspace, it has a similar vibe to this... |
| tesa131313 2006-12-04 ch 1, | abuseThe thing I love in this poem is that the thoughts and emotion that you write are so literal and unsymbolic! I noticed it and it's just so brilliant that you can write a simple emotion with such detail! One simple subject is multifaceted in your work and it's great and refreshing |
| Midnight Star Lights 2006-11-13 ch 1, | abuseI got it. I feel that way sometimes too. I really love this one too.. |
| Chatterpillar 2006-07-20 ch 1, | abusei like it, and i understand it. sometimes i wonder where i am in my own faith, and this kinda sums it up. let me believe my own way. i don't need to do anything to prove anything. |
| myalteredego 2006-07-02 ch 1, | abuseyou won't believe me but i get it. i'm a devout, but i understand exactly what you're saying and how you got there. that's how i was once... ~Ama |