Reviews for Rule 17: Never Have Detention With A Hot Guy

Reviews For: Rule 17: Never Have Detention With A Hot Guy - Reviews: Page 1 of 5

Carmel March 2008-02-04 ch 9,	abuseEven though it's been awhile since I've been on Fictionpress, I've definitely not forgotten this story. I'm loving it! It's this kind of story that keeps me coming back for more. So, I hope to see more from you soon :) ~Carm~
funky diva:) 2007-12-05 ch 8, anon.	abuseheya mimi!..euu rawkz!..Ure story iz darnin GREAT n i lurve it lotsa!..Update soon kayys! I look 4ward 2 it! :)
Carmel March 2007-12-05 ch 8,	abuseThat was amazingly amazing. Even though it's been awhile since I've set eyes on this story (about which I am terribly sorry about!), I immediately got right back into it the moment I started reading. This story keeps getting deeper and even more interesting. Keep up this wonderful work, and I'm looking forward to reading more :) ~Carm~
Inkhearts and Inkstains 2007-12-04 ch 8,	abuseI love your story and the humour in it. Please keep writing.
starzdestiny 2007-12-04 ch 8,	abusekool story...keep it up!!
Firwoods 2007-12-04 ch 1,	abuseOMG. Imagine my shock when I clicked on your homepage and saw the pictures of the Sec4 Cedar prom and realised we're from the same school! Good luck with getting back your results next year! Btw, I love Lin! Her character is so endearing! I'm going on to the next chapter. --grin-- (P.S I would love it if you could review 'A Whole New World', a story I'm currently working on. Thanks!)
Farah Diyanah 2007-12-04 ch 1,	abuseAwesome story! Interesting and funny. Excellent combination.
outofmymind123 2007-11-27 ch 8,	abuseOh my god you're back. yay. I loved the last line of this chapter “The world is almost ending and what the heck are you mortals doing?” just brillaint. Can't wait for the next chapter update soon.
spinelesslysweet 2007-11-27 ch 1,	abusehey nice story! n great summary! the thing abt the centaur ordering around was just so funny, i had to look in but im readin it from my school library so havent read all the chapters. will pop in later tho, keep writin!
Clargirl5 2007-08-08 ch 7,	abuseThat is one amazing story... very original! But, thats a very cruel place to leave it... please continue the story!
Carmel March 2007-04-19 ch 7,	abuseHello hello! This is an extremely entertaining story you've got here. It's funny, but serious at times as well. Good job, and I can't wait to read more! ~carm~
NiceShoesLetsFcuk 2007-02-20 ch 1,	abuseThis is cute.
wolfblood82 2007-02-13 ch 2,	abuseHeya there! It's me again! ^^ Anyway, glad to review this again... actually, I was wondering where this story will go in the first chapter, but it seems that I've got an idea now... actually, this story reminds me of The Chronicles of Narnia. If you've seen The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe movie or novel of the Narnia series, you'll know... I really wonder what's gonna happen next in this story. It seems to me that Evan and Lin do have some form of chemistry here. And "penis butter" lol! XD Anyway, thanks for your reviews just now. And yeah, hope to see more of them soon. Bye! ^^
wolfblood82 2007-02-05 ch 1,	abuseHeya! It's me again if ya remember! XD Anyway, glad to be back here after such a long time... ok, I'll have to say that you did quite well in this story. I really sorta like Evan and Lin. I do think that they're an interesting pair. Maybe sparks will really fly lol! XD And yeah, a freakin' centaur in the house! O_O I really wonder what's gonna turn out from this... sorry if my review is rather short, but I can't really think of anything now... P.S: Hope to see your reviews again for Elven Chronicles and my other stories. Thanks! :)
Shadow Stalkr 2007-01-29 ch 1,	abuseI find prologues useless. They usually are written to literally bore a reader away. I mean, really, how often do you put a cliff-hanger or a proper hook for a reader in one? How do you feel when you go in your friend's house and find their room in a mess? Not very comfortable, huh? That's the image I got when this page clicked open. Okay, read the first few paragraphs. How many names do you have there? From Mercedes Benz to Bruce Gleick. If you'd ask me, Bruce's name sounds like Glue and Yuck. Just to show what goes on in my mind as I scroll over. I'm not against car models and singers, but, is all of that truly necessary? Some authors have an incredibly "personal" style, but their works get old as quickly as the slang they use. I mean, what would a work where people listen to The Beatles look now? Silly. You might be a short stacker when it comes to writing, but it's better not to put labels into work. The next thing would be the very fact that your prologue is a part of this chapter, and it is a separate part. That's a crime of sorts: if a story has five chapters, you put each chapter in a separate section of a story. Your prologue left me impressed. It was a bad impression, but nonetheless. From that moment, I've found discontent in reading any new name within this chapter. Too much is too much. Others might never complain, but this is a problem. I've noticed lack of direction. Favour, favorite...pick: British or American. This might come as harsh to you, but the a. b. c. list and the name bits in bold wreaking more havoc really messed up this reading experience. Cut down on the informal language. Oh. Me. Gosh. is on the same level as durr. dawg. Lay off the slang. It does not make me feel the characters' realism. It makes me gag. You "hear" how people think in movies. Your way of describing thought is somewhat similar. Movies are made for the simple in nine cases out of ten. Maybe at least some food for thought? I keep staring at the OH. ME. GOSH. and I can't force myself to read further. Sure it is your story, but the style is way too chaotic to express realism. First person - good for you. Your characters are original, but their personalities are putting you under fire. I don't feel discontent about them. I feel annoyed because of your use of English. Such things never happened due to my own flaws. Get rid of the prologue and don't jump between people's perspectives more than once per chapter. Readers love a colourful facade. Give them what they want. You will always have fans and dogs that will follow your every word, but catching a reader takes effort. You asked me to review. So I have. The writing was not bad, but I would never read anything like this for pleasure. Have a nice, abuse-free day.

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