Quite entertaining!

When she calls her brother a dork in German she said "Sie sind" which is the formal you. When talking to her brother or a friend she would say "du bist".

really good!

good

i really liked it! the ending was really sad but really lovely!
charlotte

Okay, Do you actually research the wines and cars and stuff to put in the story? If you do, that's great. I like the way this is going so far. Great story. But, again I found some stuff.

"We inscended up the stairs and into the hall."
-inscended isn't a word from what i could find. I think you mean ascended.
"I hope I make itthough dinneralive"
-I think we all knew what you meant, but I'm just pointing it out as a typo. :) good job. Keep up the good work.

~E. Sapphire

Okay, this is a very interesting concept. Very creative. I do have some points though.
"I've heard you over in the lounge talking about it to your friend about it." -about it twice
" do you ask?" -was there supposed to be a 'why' there?
other than that it seems to be a great story.

~E. Sapphire

hey, just wanted to say that "bin ich ihr vater" is wrong for "i am your father". it would be "ICH BIN ihr Vater."

okay... one problem.

you said earlier in the story that miranda's mother died while giving birth to her. but then she also has a brother six years younger than her...

i dont get it... is pres her step-bro?

aww so sweet!

xx

i LOVE this story !

This has got to be one of the best stories ever. I loved it so much.

i wish i found this story before...i'm loving it...nice job..

Lovely and sad ending! Great story!

Interesting

I happened across a card captor story exactly like urs. SOmeone is stealing stories from this site but the jackass is recreating them with the exact same summary and title just changing names. REport them heres the link
she is darkstar of ice