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| fallenblackangel 2006-07-20 ch 1, | abuseOh my god! I'm speachless! That was just so ... good! Keep writing! I really like this! |
| the artist 2006-07-17 ch 1, anon. | abusevery well written, i can realate. very nicely done keep going |
| Edgar Wellington 2006-07-17 ch 1, | abuseThis poem is interesting. Like other pieces of yours, there is a sense of reality to it, by which I mean truth. It makes me want to approach you with something of a talk-down -- e.g. "You don't have to jump. Go on, get down off that ledge..." Your poetry is worth reading. There is a surface style which is both compelling and surprising. For example: "His face so elegantly gnawedfrom the hounds of worryAnd the beasts of fear, his eyes perfectlyPumped with veins from the sleepless years," At this point I am hunkered on the edge of your seeming contradictions, "elegant gnawing", "perfectly/Pumped with veins..." I am pumped... then...understated terror: "But a smile does twitch to life,Like a beaten wifeWhen such a drunken husbandDoes call." I found my mouth twitching in fear. There are a lot of great expressions in this poem "the squeamish organs of fear". Refering to secrets as "sleek and fleeting frills". The other thing I noticed about this poem is that it seems to be a dream or out-of-body experience, as though "he" passes in and out of death. Very well done. You've justified my adding you to my favorites. Thanks for sharing your words! Please, keep writing! |
| Marionette Silence 2006-07-16 ch 1, | abuseWow... I loved it! This one was absolutely amazing. I just wanted to check out some of your own work... thank you for reviewing 'Disillusioned Hearts.' Keep up the good work, and also, if you're interested- please check out my chapter story: An Assassin's Bounty. Thanks again, and good job. ~*Silence |