|Reviews for Going Home|
| mindOFdeliriousUNREST 7/21/06 . chapter 1
this is beautiful writing! the images created are absolutely exquisite. i could go on and on about how much i love this poem.
| Moondog Dozier 7/19/06 . chapter 1
There is such a familiar tone and sound to this, which magnifies the title as it just seems comfortable. Like everything is in its place. Well developed to grasp the abstract concept of a universal "going home", and making it specific to an individual situation, as well as the larger universal situation. I like it because it is a level-interpretation work, whichever level the reader wishes to view it on it adheres to that interpretation. Excellent work.
| Brighid 7/19/06 . chapter 1
I thought the poem was very well written. Uncharted maps is a tad nonsensical, however I appreciate the fact that this poem is to be enjoyed by the 'thinking man,' not any old idiot with poor taste, bad skills, and a superiority-complex
| steev 7/18/06 . chapter 1
S1:L1- bad line break. The phrase "uncharted maps" is a contradiction (maps being inherently charted), & is therefore meaningless.
L2-4- decent, but the end of L4 should be cut.
L5- abstract, meaningless, corny ("reality ascends") nonsense.
S2: Why is the narrator traveling west? This is never stated, making this part of the poem worthless.
S3: Whose? You're either addressing the reader (something which is completely illogical here) or someone else, but you don't specify. Again, this is rendered meaningless- no one but yourself can possibly know what you mean. Bad line break. "Peach fuzz /round/"- "round" here is obnoxious. Shadows are not a source of light; this is nonsensical.
S4:L1- "Leave me" is melodramatic & trite when placed here- the phrase doesn't bear enough weight to justify its lone placement.
L2- bad line break.
L3- "once more can"- archaic, corny phrasing. "This place"- where? Huh? What the fuck are you talking about? The lack of any specification or previous description of the place makes this location unknown to the reader. The metaphor of the enroachment of trees upon something to obscure it (in "age or legend") is ridiculously cliched, & a terrible way to end the poem.
| Halcyon Impulsion 7/18/06 . chapter 1
First and last stanzas really do what they need to do - capture and hold fast :) Excellent work.
| The Un-great-ful 7/18/06 . chapter 1
Magical. you're a captivating person.
| Niels Stegeman 7/18/06 . chapter 1
I think it's one of your best to date. Truly spectacular imagery! Loved it.