|Reviews for further south|
| no.peace.los.angeles 11/9/06 . chapter 1
Whoa, nice run-on sentence! I love the idea of a blue corduroy heart, because it's a really strong visual that I can see and feel (I love corduroy *purrs*). Nice language throughout this, and the form really makes the flow work better, if that makes sense. Keep writing! :)
| Aquafied 8/7/06 . chapter 1
it is words that crescendo and dear, i cant spell anymore
| Silence the Storm 7/31/06 . chapter 1
Excellent, excellent work...'Your blue corduroy heart', that's superb imagery right there. This poem has a lovely smooth feel to it. The brilliantly placed breaks give it an uneven, unique rhythm. Marvelous poem from beginning to end.
| classic violet 7/25/06 . chapter 1
the format of this, the words, the vividness, the colour: amazing!
this poem is just so incredibley well done. god, i just love it!
| emeraude-irlandais 7/25/06 . chapter 1
What is with these line breaks? The phrasing you use is beautiful, with "angel catastrophe" and "circular expression" swimming around, but I was incredibly turned off by the staccato feel. bella
| Halcyon Impulsion 7/24/06 . chapter 1
Very smooth, great language. Abstract yet clearly specific. Takes you to another place, if you let it.