Great dialogue and pacing. I like the way you use the journal entries to give insight into the main characters' pasts, and you've written the emotional scenes very well - they ring true rather than seeming dramatic or overdone. Flora's development in the third chapter is intriguing, and I'm interested to see how her relationship with Juniper turns out. Keep updating!

Ooh, I love the journal from Flora's point of view, it definitely helps characterize her. I didn't expect that at all out of her, and I think the rivalry between the sisters will be really interesting to see play out.

I really liked how you did the scene with her father's death. It was sad, but not melodramatic or anything -- I think the pacing and the time spent on it was perfect.

I can't wait to read more of this, please update soon!

I like the way you're formatting this, with a journal entry at the beginning. It's very unique! However, a few lines from the journal sounded kind of forced. Such as: "I always have to pull myself away from staring at his crystal eyes, pale, clear skin, and shoulder length, flowing dark hair." It might be better to just wait to describe Richard until when she sees him later, because it doesn't seem realistic for someone to write that much detail about someone in their journal, even if it is a supersexyvampire. xD

And ooh, a very interesting development at the end! I can't wait to see what her reaction -- and the vampires' reactions -- are. This is a great story so far!

Ooh, I love this so far! Vampires have become a pretty cliche, overdone subject in recent years, but you managed to put a creative, original spin on it that makes it really interesting. Your description is also great -- it's so easy to picture the whole thing as I read it. Great job!

I love how you showed the reaction from the crowd as in human positive and human negative. I got this uh-oh feeling when i was reading floras journal entry and i also love youre dialougue. Dominic sounds like a less pver the top character from hamlet:O Briliant. i noticed slow updating at the top with it created and updated but i can wait:P:D

Well i must admit the end wasnt really a suprise but it was still nicely said. I like how you keep adding these small details and descriptions almost absentmindedly. Um thats a good thing. I wonder is the father hoping for a union beetween humans and vampires, thatd be interesting:P

Well youre characters are kinda awesome. Floras my favourite:P When you mentioned twilight in youre last Pm i almost went into a twilight rant.:) I like how the fathers ready to die thing, its more realistic then a vampire living, forever and forever, and forever E.t.c.

It has an interesting start and i'm looking forward to the coming chapters.

Good job =)

Excellent chapter! I loved that you began with words from Flora and ended with seeing Flora. Excellent wrap up for this chapter. I was listening to Paramore's We are Broken through it--it fit nicely,especially with the beginning. Great job--I'm so happy to see this story start up again.

Hm, very interesting! I like this alot...this may be a stupid question but why can't she just be turned?? Anyway great story and you need to continue it!

I do really like this!! I would probably like it more if I could actually pay attention but SOMEONE won't be quiet!! Grr!! Anyhow Great story!!

Hey, thanks for almost making me late to class. Could you not write so good? Please? And maybe put a warning in the summary: this story is captivating and will make you miss your test.

Thanks.

I'm jk. Update soon, it's great.

*squee!* Oh, I'm so excited! This is going to be awesome! Great work, Trish!

I. LOVE. THIS. STORY! GREAT work. You make me proud (*tear*). I can't wait for more. Fantastic descriptions, and I can't express how well this flowed. Nice job, Trishie!