It flows beautifully. That's about as much as I can tell you about its posture.

But as I read it, it was effective, powerful, and I loved every line of it. I love how it starts, no stalling, no nothing, to the point and... well, (my eloquence is breath-taking, you gotta admit)...
Lol. either way, I really loved it, great work.

^^

This is really good. You've got some striking lines in this, and the constant rhyme makes them even better. "Teachers tought" through "on the side" really struck me. Great poem.
-Devon
P.S. I have favorited you. Haven't reviewed as many of your poems as I've read but I like them.

Life goes on...we are all but just pieces of the whole. This poem is sad and a bit gloomy but so true on so many levels. Wonderful bit of insight. Scottie

Wow. So I'm pretty sure I might be in awe right now. First off, this rhymed (duh) but you managed to rhyme without it becoming forced or cliche. And secondly, this rhymed and was actually quite a "deep" poem. Awesome job.

what a gloomy outlook! altho it is probably true to an extent. good poem tho, great rhyming ^^ thanks for the review too

great peice, i'm not sure i agree with the idea that no one cares when a person dies, i think a lot of times people don't realise how much a person means to them until that person is gone, and then it's too late, and you wish you could go back in time and fix it, at least tha'ts how i see this piece, but i have a tendency of getting things wrong, wonderful work all the same, thank you once again for sharing

it's cool. i like it. keep it up!

-llazuli-

i like it. it rhymes.. hmm.. keep it up!~Liz