Don't worry your story is not bad. The events seem a little rushed- last time I recall you don't just meet someone and then later offer yourself to accompany the guy lol. Um over all is really good. I like it, it migth be a slightly cliche in the encounter but none the less is a good cliff hanger. Is really good I am sure you will get alot reviews.

-bye

OH! Cliff hanger! Please keep this up, I'm enjoying reading! thanks. Ashleigh

Woot! Good start. Just don't let it flop from now on! I can feel a good story coming on, and I'll definately be following. So keep it up and please write more! Love Ashleigh. P.s Shine Brightly!