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| kirara12 2008-07-18 ch 2,  | abuseThe way you started seemed like a continuation rather then a new chapter I'd put something at the top to tell the readers this is something new. You have a lot of dialog but not enough descriptions, and it seems really rushed. yeah I have to agree that the princess is really spoiled, but you know because she's a princess maybe you could soften up her language a bit, she seems like a tomboy to me. She needs to be more formal, I mean she is a princess. |
| Cashaholic 2008-05-25 ch 5, | abuseinteresting, and very very... different. Really nice, so update soon, yea? |
| Chris Rhyanne 2008-05-18 ch 6, | abuseVery good, very good. there are a few punctuation errors and... you repeated one of the chapters. 0:) So... You might want to fix that, and I'm hoping to read ch6 soon. |
| TheTrueBlue41728 2008-05-18 ch 6, | abuse*Confused* I've read this before. |
| cue.dramatic.gasp. 2008-04-20 ch 5, | abuseInteresting. Update soon. Me likey! (: |
| ash 2008-03-06 ch 5, anon. | abuseI liked this chapter. Although, it seemed a bit rushed and there were a few grammar issues. But, OMG! Cliffhanger! |
| shepromised-shelied 2008-03-06 ch 5, | abuseGah! Keep going. You can't just leave me hanging there! Pshh. Dominic is soo... rawr. Heh. I really liked this chapter, except perhaps you should show more emotions. More in depth of the feelings that are developing. You're doing great. Please keep going. |
| Ilerya 2008-03-05 ch 5, | abuseI'm hooked! I've always loved the Princess idea, Kingdom Hearts being one of my favourite games because it holds the Disney Princess as something more than you really see... Like the stitching that holds the fabric of the world of goodness and light together. Your take on this is more adult/young adult and its a very appealing, compelling tale. I'm enjoying it wholeheartedly! Your dialogue flows and I enjoy the narration, it's smooth and flows well with the story. |
| superinsane95 2008-03-04 ch 5, | abuseaw sweetness please update |
| TheTrueBlue41728 2008-03-04 ch 5, | abuseOoh la la. Lowcut dress. HOT DAMN. Domenic. Lol, that's the name of the German foreign exchange student. She told him she'd go back to the palace. And two weeks later she's not there? GRADY FTW. |
| TrixInTreats 2008-03-04 ch 5, | abusewho the hell ends at - there is a moemnt of silence. nononono. update it =] i likes it...its developing! growing! Mwuhahahahaha yeah. anyway. i ike domenic. =] |
| Written 2008-02-23 ch 4, | abusecan't wait to see what happens next :) |
| Written 2008-02-23 ch 3, | abusewow, your writing is actually improving as you go along. that's awesome. another great chapter! |
| Written 2008-02-23 ch 2, | abusethe King is way too harsh! I hope she finds a happy ending.. |
| Written 2008-02-23 ch 1, | abusethis is very fresh and funny! I totally love it and can't wait to read more. :) |