Ach, the story is so wonderful, I'm at a loss for words, *thinks for a moment, and then squeals in delight* You're going to update soo, right? Right? Luke will not be pleased if you deny me...I think it helps when i threaAten with him to mention he's a telepath with mind control powers, who dotes on me and his sister. 'Course, he denies being my friend, but don't mind my nonsense, because I tend to ramble...a lot...yeah...did I mention that this happens all the time? Nope, I guess not.

Wow, this was a great start to the story. I see now that you haven't updated in awhile, but I can still hope. I'll give you...a cookie! Yes, I'll give you a cookie if you update :) You know you want a cookie.

~carm~

Okay now it's time for super helpful Tasha, (since you said on the last story that you wanted help or what not...and I kinda forget to help you out) AND you're going to love her, she's just as lovely as regular Tasha :P Alright here she goes...

"The soft black petals brushed against Erich’s face, making him sneezed violently." I think you should put 'sneeze', okay?

"Erich collapsed with warning at all onto the cold granite rock." You should add 'no' between with and warning.

"...bringing up dust and debris, thus blinding Erich momentarily and made him coughed profusely." Right, I think you should put 'cough' and instead of 'and' put 'which' because I think it may sound a little bit better, okies?

"The first things Erich noticed was his eyes and hair..." I may be wrong, my precious lil' bambino, but I think it would be better to put 'were' instead of 'was'.

Anyway, helpful Tasha's gone now and so it's just me! Hehe (Im weird I know) Anyway, this was a good chapter, I like Erich...not too sure about Jez but hmm...we shall see. Update soonish, okay?

Ciao bambi!!

Yay new chapter

It's good. There is no difference between toward and towards, to my knowledge. Just use whichever one sounds better in the context of the story.

Interesting, I just finished reading the first chaper of the other part to this as well...btw chapter 11 of Guardians is up if you didn't check...

wow now i feel sorry for both of them. hope he gets better in the next chapter. = ) can't wait until you update! *mel

Wow! A new story and it looks pretty interesting so far. Erich is definiely a ladies man isn't he? Hmm, anyway I hope you update this soon...i know you always take long to update but I will be waiting patiently :)

Ciao!

wow kool! u know that was one of my questions... whether the two went 2getha... lol :D

loving all the names of the characters! and omg from this first chap and the summary it sounds like it's gonna be a gd one!

ur writing is def improving (not that it wasnt gd b4) so keep it up! looking forward to an update! (hint hint lol)

kat x