Share/Save/Bookmark
Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search Login Register Extras
Reviews For: Ment To Be

moon maiden of time
2006-09-01
ch 1,
The ending is slightly cheesy but still ridiculously beautiful. But the thing is, you should really pause a moment, focus on the details, on the emotions, make it more vibrant. And maybe use real, dialog, with quotation marks...it'd probably be easier to read.
Noelle
2006-08-27
ch 1,
you should keep going. it would be an interesting story.
cormorant
2006-08-27
ch 1,
Woot. Could use a little dialogue maybe, but i like it. Obvious refernces, eh?
Return to Top