I love this. the rhyming was awesome && the choice of words was nice. 'But when I was out of sight and out of mind' I think songs should contain deep emotions && should hook the readers/listeners. && this had definitely caught me. :)

Oh. && thanks for sending it to me. :) My review in 'Let Go!', however, was rejected. FP says Ive reviewed it already. :)

-Hannah

I like this, especially the lines: "When it came to something real
There was no way you could deal"

I think this line is a little awkward: "Your only concern was having a ball." Maybe you could replace 'having a ball' with something else.

don't you love when people do this? But what lies did she tell? you didn't really say.

very nice. i love it... anyone can relate to this

great rhyming meter! nice poem =)

thats so sad. i hope you'll be ok soon.

I loved this song! It's totally something anyone can relate to! You can write awesome songs! You should do more! I could feel your deep emotions coming from this one. Please make more like this. I actually could see someone singing this. *nervous laugh* I actually tried to sing the works to my own made up beat. It didn't sound so bad...to my ears. lol.

this is really good, i've been busy of late, and am glad i came across this peice, your work shows a lot of improvment from the last time i read it, so great job, this is a really great song, keep up the good work and as always thank you for sharing

*grins* oh dear god... i like it... i didn't know you could write songs... this just proved me wrong... it's like... damnit... i can't think! it was awesome.. there we go! write more songs. cause they are like the shiznit!