I saw your post on the Muse Juice Cafe and decided to check out and see if you had any fantasy-genre stories and voila, I found this. This sounds rather interesting but to give you more "constructive criticism" I'll have to check out the whole story.

PS: Why don't you accept anonymous reviews?

Wow, really great job with this short story. I really enjoyed reading this story. You have created a fascinating world, and I want to know more. I don't know if there are any more chapters to this, but great job. And I especially liked your first paragraph..."Today was indeed an inspirational day for Daive. Inhaling the sweet aroma of the berries shipped from Telimun, he promised himself he would buy the whole stand. The lump under his sleeveless shirt was a good one today, none from fighting or running away from his always successful thievery’s, but from a necklace that would put his family out of this poor city and into, hopefully, Calizette. A land with large houses and fancy schools, where the weather seemed to always be sunny, and the air smelled of famous Telimun berries and Sazrael juices all the time; that was Calizette." Great job and keep up the good work. Take it easy.

WOW! I loved it! You must write more on this! I want to know just what thgis diamond is! The world of gods and godesses is just too much! You have quite the creative mind! Keep up the good work! ^^

Ryumaru

Reviewing back since you reviewed mine.

I liked this, although it could've used an ending. And I kept calling Daive 'Davie' for some reason...

Anyway, are you planning on writing more? If so, I shall read! It seems like you have more to say after the last sentence, and I can see a larger plot.

Yeah, I suck at reviewing things. - sigh - Oh well.

Peace, love, goo,

RS

Oh, I like this! Is this considered the entire short story, or will there be more? Keep up the good work, I think you've got something here!

-Mad

p.s. put you on my favorite author list. please R&R my stuff!

GAH! wheres the rest? you cant start a story like that and then post it without an ending! lol [thats a hint that you should really finish it haha] i like the imagination you've shown in writing this. it takes a lot of creativity to think up stories like these... something i believe is being lost in our day and age. creativity seems to be lost somewhere. Keep it up! again though, check grammar, i only found a few minor details, but it could mean the difference between someone really appreciating your work and thinking you need a little more practice. ill look forward to you hopefully finishing this story.--ryan

OMG no one ever reviewed on this !! It's awsuem !! I luv it ! You shoul defiantly continue this ,and I promise ppl will catch on 2 this story ! It took them a while 2 catch on 2 on 2 my story 2 , so give it time . I luv this so please plaes write more ! Please return the favor and r&r my story Frogs,Warts and Kisses . I would greatly apreciate it ^ ^.

I know, I know, reviewing my OWN stories but it saddens me how I try so ** these stories and nobody even bothers to read and review!