A rewrite? This looks and sounds different than it did when I read it last. A good improvment. Keep writing!

Peace, Daze

Nicely written. I really like this a lot.

Simple, descriptive Haiku. But it could use a little bit of "schwung".. I really like the second line though.Keep writing!

The moon... the stars, some of the greatest things in the world, wonderful job.

with love, IFoS

There was nothing really wrong with this haiku, but there was also something lacking in it. In theory a simple haiku is the best haiku, but really you do need to jazz them up a little, use some interesting and/or original words, just to make it stand out. As it is there is no imagery here besides a very black and white cut out. I'd like to see this rewritten as I think it could be something quite nice.

Peace, Daze

Um. I didn't really like this. I didn't find it flowed well at all. I would take this idea and expand on it. Make it longer and put more details and thought into it. Sometimes short poems are good, but this didn't have any meat to it...If you know what I mean. ~Rowan~