FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| JJJRRR 2006-09-10 ch 1,  | abuseThe structure of this poem is good, but, you need to draw out the context more. By that I don't mean the feelings, feelings complicate imagery, like calling blood strawberry means something different than calling it wine, no need to get into what it means, so much as communicate it through the words you choose. However, this is a good poem, I think you could probably do some great stuff just let it slide a bit farther away from you, if you get my drift. Keep going! :) |