I like the style of introduction you use, with the four separate characters each getting the spotlight. The italicized words are interesting as well.

Critique wise, I think you should look for smoother ways to integrate descriptions of the characters. For example, you use the words 'male' and 'female' a lot, and it makes them sound like animals. Try things like man, boy, woman, girl, etc. to make it more poetic and less coldly scientific.

Hope this is helpful!

O.o I actually really enjoyed this! Update soon!

hm...I know I've seen that title before... AHAH! You're on w.onlinecomics.net also! AWESOME! Ahh, I love when some of my favorite websites collide.^_^