(Finally got here!)Well wow, you really got the sense of a person with too much to think about in their head, so that the world around them sounds confusing and scary. The bit with the fan for some reason I really liked, and after that it was like she was screaming inside her head for it all to stop.

very good!! i love it i get your point. your a great writer. but the last 3 lines i dont get...you might want to work on that