Just discovered fictionpress and your story is the first I've read. After reading this I really wish I'd known about the site sooner!

This was wonderful, from beginning to end.

I'd love to read Murashi's p.o.v.

Simply adorable omg i now have a top story X3

*smiles* That was really cute, and overall very good. The only thing that seemed a little out of place was Kazuhaka's observation that he never saw any other customers but him, because Marushi clearly states that he has customers and obviously he needs them for his business to survive, so it just seemed kind of random and confusing to point that out. But really, that's such a small thing for me to complain about; other than that it was very enjoyable :)

Aww, how sweet

Aw so cute! :)

While I was reading, I noticed that there were a few places where punctuation could have been stronger or more exact, but it's nothing that takes immediate precedence.

I just wanted to point out that maybe, in an author's note or something, you might want to explain to your readers when you place your fics in a different country or time frame simply to clear up the cultural and name differences so that people don't end up going, "Murashi... Kazutaka... Hiroue...? Aren't I reading in America?" The only reason I mentioned this is because you might have some readers that don't know the mindset or the know what things are or mean when you use the corresponding words in a different language ("Yen", for example).

I liked the way you wrote this because the main character was developed well and not a 2D, cardboard copy-paste character. I do, however, think you could have incorporated a little more description into your writing as far as delicacy and finesse went. Not necessarily in physical description, but maybe more in the department of emotional wealth (strengths, weaknesses, etc...) just to add a little bit more realism to your writing and to make it a little bit easier for the reader to identify with.

Overall, I'm glad I clicked and I look forward to seeing more works done by you.

Thanks for the read!

A.

Oh how sweet...

It made me sigh and smile. It was so sweet! T_T

*twitches*

My rabid fangirl wishes to come out now.

I LOVE IT! *squeals*

That was so cute!

i love it! lemon is my favorite flavor too! :)

It's so cute :D

Aww! Love it, wish you would write more.

Thats so cute...love it!

This is such a cute little oneshot. It made me smile the whole way through-especially the ending. So cute. It was just so obvious that it was unexpected. Just go up to eachother and ask... XDD An both of them waited years. You should do one in Marushi's point of view. 'He came in everyday and ordered something lemony' lol