Oh sure. Blame your bad writing on someone else. And i thought Essro helped you anyway... But i think you should just revise your work. You could delete the other story from the website but i would not delete it from your computer completely. It is good to save your work. So... Waiting for more. Typo

So sorry. my computer has been down for ever. So it seems. Well this chapter was interesting.:( Ok. So the girl was new but not my style. Then again this whole thing is "not my style". but i still read it so , be grateful! Off toread the notice you posted. Typo

Lol, don't worry. I've done that more times than I can count. I'm actually in one of those demotivated moods right now... have been for the past couplea days... plus with a 20 word essay due on thursday... yeah. I hate being a senior.
Anywho! Lookin' forward to the revised version! Should be pretty awesome if this version is any indication of what it will be like.

It's about time you got to this part! Aside from that it was good.

Yay! Update!

Another great chapter. The action part went well with the music I was listening to, lol.

Glad to see yer still writing this story. I thought you had given up for a while there.

You actually put the name Jade, how nice...I didn't notice. Anyway...it was good...even though it's not my kind of style but it has a lot of action that would keep my interest...Keyword..WOULD..lol..

wow...that's a weird dream...I think

I think that it's too long for me. hehehe

This'll make me look stupid for reveiwing myself but, whatever. Anyway, how sad... I only have twice as many reveiws as Essro and 5x the amount of chapters... I must find Essro and force her to reveiw! Muahahahahahaha! None of you heard that...

Okay, its not as bad as yer nfta makes it out to be. It did seem kinda rushed, but thats okay cuz you can always go back and revamp it and then upload a new version of the chapter... if you feel its necissary.
Anyway, it was still a pretty good chapter.

BTW: I've completed uploading my NaNoWriMo novel. All 17 Chapters are up and ready to read.

O! Is Xenos goin' to marry the girl? That would be really romantic. Did Essro write any of Malevolence? Anyway, I'm like really into the boys Zevo and Arsen... Can you describe them more? i think you need more detailed things on the Desade people organization. It is sometimes hard to follow their ctions... So anyway can i have your e-mail or are you like a freak out person owhen it comes to telling about anything? See you. Typo

This story is ...well...different. I read your profile thing. Why are you so like dark or whatever? I think Essro has a good handle on you. It's cool to see you talkin togehter in the Note from the Author. So like do that more often. Oh and I really liked the Princess girl in whatever chapter. i read the story before reviewing so that is why it is on this one... So i'll leave you and essro to gripe.
~typo

Very good indeed! I rather liked this part,

It was the weapon my father used, before he died…”

Xenos nodded again, deciding that sympathy would only hurt his pride.

“Hey, Xen, thanks for not giving me the ‘Aw, you poor little thing’ shtick. It gets on ya nerves afta some time, y’know?”

I was wondering if you chose the name `Xenos` because it means stranger or foreigner in ancient Greek, thereby implying your character is an outcast of society. Was that why you chose it or am I reading too much into things and it was just an interesting coincidence?

Again - this was very good.

I've only read the first chapter so far, but this looks rather good. It takes a very original view of a tried and tested situation and makes things interesting.

I'll review again once I've read the whole story so far.

The story was kinda cool...Anyway the conversation with Dimo was ike confusing. Can I have your e-mail? Later
Red