I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to review!! I read through entire story, like, three months ago. My sisters wedding threw everything into a swirling vortex though, and I have only recently been able to pull myself out. My sincerest apologies!

Excellent as always Elaine! You have created an enticing beginning, a cliff hanger chapter ending, and a character that I, at least, can identify with. Other than a few grammatical, spelling, and typing errors, I would say you have again reached near perfection. It may be complete perfection if the story itself is completed! Ah, perhaps someday, huh?? : )

There are, however, two things that really stand out to me. One; you begin the chapter with, “She opened a bleary eye and groaned.” I think perhaps that the reason that you begin with “She” is that you want to keep Cat’s name unrevealed until Zair shouts it into the answering machine. But I think that it might be better if instead of using the pronoun “she”, (which is kinda confusing since their was no noun in any preceding sentence, partially because there WAS no preceding sentence, anyway) you might use a noun (not necessarily her name though) and some adjectives.

Which leads me to the second thing that stands out to me. You are very good with things like describing atmosphere, surroundings, facial expressions, and personalities, but are slightly lacking in the physical descriptions area. Does Cat have black hair and grey eyes, brown hair and brown eyes, red hair and green eyes, blonde hair and blue eyes? Is her complexion clear and pale, freckled, or tanned? Is her body type slim? Or just average? My minds eye craves images! This is one complaint that I think has surfaced in ALL of my reviews to EVERYONE that I have EVER reviewed on! So, don’t feel picked on or anything! : )

Well, I think I’m done now. At least with this chapter. : ) I liked this story a lot. This is probably one of my favorites of yours. Continue, please, and give us a Chapter Three!

Well written and interesting story. Can't wait for the next part - this story seems to have a lot of potential. Good job. Keep it up.