Aw! omg so much heartbreak! how can one heart take so much?
Your amazing you know that?

I love the line: "Yet your chocolate eyes still sear my soul." (I guess it's because I'm a sucker for brown eyes.)

Although it is inconsistent with the rest of the poem, I also like the subtle rhyming near the middle.

Poignant and moving; the meassage is very sweet and simple.

it's sad, yet very moving.

Bittersweet this is. Throwing oneself into his (I'm assuming that it's a him) work due to a lost loved one, wondering whether things would have changed if she hadn't made up her mind to leave... the picture is the focal point of everything and you do it well. It would have been good to put in why she left in the first place though, that might make it better. Or is that because she didn't care for the author anymore? Yeah. I love the words you use; individually they aren't much but together, they form the most beautiful stanzas. :)

Louisa
reviewers_found

luv reading your works, keep them coming

I really like this . Emotions just flow off this peice to the reader . Great job .

wow im not one for reading poetry but this was simple and easy flowing and the message clear. i wonder how ppl look one another in the eye and lie bout how they really feel.

this is very nice...but remember you have mel now...things will get better...she'll hel ypu forget the painfull memories of the past...if not...just know that i care for you and im always here if you need osme one to talk to.SW X3

Hey, I'm from yahoo, too.

I liked this and thought it was written well. Although you could have put in some more description, I still enjoyed it. :)

Hey, Jazzy from youngwriters at yahoo. I *really* like this piece, the imagery of the chocolate eyes, the question of how would things be different. My only thing is that I'm not sure if this is supposed to be angsty or nostalgic. It's a lovely sad piece, but are you looking back or bemoaning the fact? (hehe, that rhymed). Just curious.

Very nice piece altogether. :)

nice. really i like it.. 8D