FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| no.peace.los.angeles 2007-01-12 ch 1,   | Interesting piece. I think it's the first time I've ever read about a cleft lip in poetry, so points for originality. The first line in particular has wonderful imagery. Nice work. Keep writing! :) |
| I.O.K.O 2007-01-11 ch 1, | That describes a lady in my no dencher adventure school. It's worse when she laughs, and when she talks to you you think you're unworthy or something because she spits on your face. And sorry about that whole "don't read this" thing. It may have been subconcious, and even though attention-grabbing it was pointless. I accept that mistake. Perhaps it was egocentric, perhaps not. |
| crazy dog events 2006-11-06 ch 1, | BAsically all of the second line sounded really pretentious, unneccessarily wordy. In general, though, it's pretty good. |
| sunday night sky 2006-10-13 ch 1, | I like the subject of this poem, and it was worded beautifully. However, I didn't like the format; the way all the lines ran together didn't really fit in to the flow and style of the poem. In my opinion. But the rest of the piece was original and thought provoking, especially the detail about the lipstick worn away to pink and the colostomy bag. The ending is great. As I'm training to be a Speech Therapist, this subject fascinates me! |
| darknessblooms 2006-10-09 ch 1, | Interesting view into a refreshingly new topic for a poem. The last sentence is beautiful in its connotation. Well done. - I see you posted this three times in a row. ? |