I love the way you can say two things at once in your poems. (whether or not you mean to!) You have a beautiful way of wording things.

"every answer proceeds with another question,
no matter how hard we try to overcome our perplexity."

LOVE those lines. Do I think its done? NO! Let your soul shine more and more.

You keep me on this stupid website lol.
Thanks for writing so vividly.

Nevr cliche!

great use of words. keep writing.
jean

Beautiful and unique imagry! I loved the line, "we're the cataclysms on God's chess board." This is very well done, I like this poem a lot. Definatley keep writing.

hm...this is actaully pretty good, though the first two lines could be better. I love it, dear.

It's static, and abrupt. But I think that just adds to it's raw and pure beauty. Honestly, this is amazing. The images, and the fragmented flowing of words are perfect.
I think it's complete. I wouldn't add anything else to it.
Beautiful write :)

This seems overdramatic, in a kind of deliberate way. I like it.

seems pretty summed up to me. some excellent imagery. well done~

keep writing

hm, how could i have missed this even with its catchy summary. but to say it's done, i would have to say no. it's rather short ... abrupt, cut-off in a sort of way.

the last stanza seemed to imply that there was more to it than that...but it could work to leave it open ended. nice work.

every time i read your stuff, i just 'wow' at it. *love this*. the descritpion is breathtaking, the word you use are perfect and the first two lines sent shivers down my spins in a 'i wish i could write like that' way.absolutely brilliant. You're going on my favourite authors list. no higher commendation then that:D

Absolutely stunning imagery and language. I love the beauty in your writing. The only thing I'm not sure of is the line 'our vex everlasting' because I'm fairly certain that 'vexation' would be the grammatically correct word. Vex is a verb.

It's very jumpy, but I think it works. The first two lines are amazing. Actually, it's all amazing. You could definitely leave it as it is and it would feel complete, but you don't have to leave it if you're not happy. I think it's great.

I think it's sounds perfectly complete. You used a beautiful variety of words in this one, and it flows very well.

it's awesome. don't worry! yeah...it's done

:D

bekah

I really like this. I'm not quite sure why, but I do.

"our vex everylasting." - did you mean 'everlasting'?