i liked the imagery and word choice. great job. you should check out "sheisdressedinpoetry". her work is amazing and yours reminded me of hers.

That was really deep & good.
Really makes you think
great writer :)

Good job on the poem! Very descriptive. I really liked the last part :
"It is here that you feel empty,
like the smoke you exhale
or like the orange-glow cigarette
hanging from your fingertips,
a cancerous worry-stone"

- Good comparison!

it gives you the shivers it's so well written

i just really like it. not sure why, it just sounds good. keep writing.