 Starblaster1234 2006-11-22 . chapter 1Font change...
Actually to tell you the truth the font change really made the last part stick out (because it was bold none-the-less).
Editor remarks: (If these were ment to be there, then...well I found it =P)
The line starting with "Never feeling..." there is a comma after stand, not a period. (also the A in and is capitalized)
Also, it is probably your writing style but none of the series of commas have a comma before the and (which is common in books...don't know about poems)
Overall, great poem. Looks at our world in a way never seen before. I enjoyed reading this one. |