Review game.
You did a great job of turning a simple situation into a nice little story! The pacing was done very well and I was motivated to keep on reading till the end. Over all I was impressed and liked the story.

You do a good job of characterization. I like how you have the main characters thoughts comming up constantly in the story. You understand that making the characters thoughts evident to the reader is a great way to get the persons personality across.

You are skilled at writing, and this story makes that obvious. Keeping the suspense up throughout the story and having a believable situation was a great idea.

What little dialog you have is done well. Chloe talks like she thinks which is an important aspect of characterization.

Good job with this piece of work, I hope you continue to write more stories :D

Gripping! Very well written, descriptive. Had my intrest the whole time. I can't wait to see what you can do with a longer story.