Reviews for My Dead End, Holding His Breath

RedRoseGrave 2006-11-06 ch 1, anon.	abuseOH MY GOD! XD This poem... so full of feeling... funny... so cool... "Met me Hugged me Held me Kissed me Loved me Dumped me …now you need me?" and "Yes I know you’re still holding your breath. I’m waiting. Are you choking yet?" were my FAVE parts. this is awesome. life can really bring on the best of poems can't it! woot! fandom!
Farran 2006-11-06 ch 1,	abuseClever, Wonderful changes in pace throughout govened by amasing control of rhyme and rythem. The atmosphere you've created is effective and well maintaied through out. And then onto the ending as I said clever. Nice work.
hellbentheretic 2006-11-05 ch 1,	abuseJust saw this one and had to read it because of the title. I enjoyed the way you presented it to the reader as someone holding their breath in anticipation for something. But what is it? It is to be accepted back by a jilted lover and yet the second thought that follows the first- why is this even worth it? 'Boyfriend/ Best friend/ Pretend/ Dead end' - that drives the point home about the feelings of the writer- she won't simply take him back, ever again. It is tragic how some relationships go so awry so fast! I like the last lines as well because I actually held my breath when I read this thing and it is quite a shock to read 'are you choking yet?' lol I was! Good work on this. I don't really see anything in the way of typos or grammer that I would change. I think you got it in one. hellbentheretic