Quite an interesting story you have going here. Will there be other chapters? If so, please update soon! ^-^

ugh, spooky. I like the wall of text, makes the story stand out, makes it even more interesting...

I'm wondering about the 'moonlight' repitition. To me it gets a little annoying, but that's just my opinion. Maybe you could have varied it with just 'light'?

I liked the end though. Just awesome.

The first few sentences of the first paragraph, all the ones with "here" in it, were a little repetitive. Just something to be aware of.

Other than that, though, I don't really have anything to comment on. The emotion in this was very tangible, the most powerful part of it. The prose itself was wonderful, sort of poetic.

Keep up the good work!

Okay, I don't think my review just then worked. :S But, I'll go ahead and send this: who cares if I look like the idiot who said the same thing twice?? XD Anyway, here's what I was going to say in my review (but only the first two lines showed up ... unless it's just my computer. *shrug* Oh well! Hehe):

'Oh, Telescope, look further!'
I LOVE that line!

‘Oh, Telescope, look further!’
I LOVE that line!

So, it's been awhile. But better late than never, I guess.

I like the concept here, and I thought your descriptions of everything were done very well. It read a little choppy, though, so you might want to try switching up your sentence structure a little more. The big block paragraph also was a little hard to get through. Other than that, though, good.

WALLS OF TEXT.
The content is great, but you really need to break it up a little. Walls of text look bad, are difficult to follow, and frankly are pretty offputting.
That said, I like the content. It's interesting, at the very least, and your style is really poetic.

Shining celestial bodies, they make me so happy. I may be trapped inside this room, constantly haunted by such pillars of papers, books, text, documents, but I am drawn, drawn to the sky. It’s beauty, oh, it’s beauty. Telescope is my eyes.

I loved that part, it felt kinda hopeful even if he was a prisoner of those walls.

This character's thought process was very interesting to read, nice work with it.

"Sick, pathetic humans..."

That line alone shows promise for the next chapter. Again, nice work, I look forward to reading more.

Very interesting. I like the dialouge, especially when the speaker began to tallk about spinning - it was very poetic. Nice work with this chapter, I look forward to reading the next.

Another good chapter. Again, I like the concept of this story and I lookforward to seeing where else you take the story. This chapter was somewhat sad, yet still written very well. Nice work, I enjoyed reading.

Very interesting beginning. I'm not use to reading stories from you so I look forward to seeing what you do with this piece.

I like your concept, it's one I've not considered and it looks as though you have a lot in mind for the story.

Nice work thus far, I look forward to reading more.

please write more this is really good so far, i liked this story the prose seemed poetic in nature, and i love poetic prose!
SO FAR so good
i just can not wait for the next chapter
this whole thing looks good, it is visual and i can see everything you write

"Amazing, Simply Amazing" discribes your story thus far

I have not been on fiction press for a while, I am in the middle of making a short film and I have been doing nothing but that, soon enough I will submit the script and have people review but for now I want to review your story.

-this is great; I like how you changed your style of writing to show the soldier’s side, it was a very effective strategy. I can not wait to see where this is going.

so far i love the concept, the story of an inmate told through those that once lived in his cell...that has the makings of something wonderful.
however
i would like it if you would use a more poetic writting style. no need to say "the clouds are dark" when you could say "the skies are bruised like nortic women"