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| Aidos Nemesis 2006-11-19 ch 1,  | abuseFunny that I should read this tonight of all nights. The exact same thoughts were just running through my mind, although in much less poetic form. Well-written, thank you for this. |
| hellbentheretic 2006-11-16 ch 1, | abuseDefinitely planned, mapped, and clever deception is the worst of the bunch; when someone deliberately pulls the wool over your eyes. You truly have a voice that is fun to read and thought provoking. I do enjoy that you used the last line of each stanza to start and next one- this drives the point home. You also used the very first line of the first stanza for the very last line of the last stanza again asking a question as you had done in the first. I like the symmetry here; it can be hard to do stuff of this nature- structure wise. I like the subject matter and how you go through the motions of someone going through the act of being subjected to deception. Very fine, hellbentheretic |