Hey! I'm really sorry I took so long to read the rest of this, Eivind. But I'm glad I finally found time! What an amazing story, really...It's incredibly emotional and sensitive - but yes, the ending certainly is uplifting! I'm so glad for Lucy, and her mother.
Great work!

I actually read this several months ago, even though I never had time to stop and write a review. I wanted to tell you that after I finished reading it, the characters stuck in my head for the next few days. They were very engaging, and you really were able to make me feel like I knew them. Good job.

Wow...just...wow. There's so much emotion already in the first chapter. It's good to say that I'm hooked ;) I like how you had smaller paragraphs in it; it was easier for my eyes. Long paragraphs intimidate me ^^; And the song was just beautiful. I could almost hear a melody playing in the background.

Overall, it's a great start! Me gusta mucho (Spanish for "I liked it a lot" - I'm going to be a Spanish major, I might even get a doctorate degree in it, I love the language so much). And it's cool how you had Japanese in there too - I've always wanted to learn Japanese but it looks like such a hard language. I think it's cool that you know some Japanese =)

the starting caught me a lot, maybe I could relate to lucy, I think everyone needs someone to feel saved and takashi was with her by the way.

the chapter 8 just surprised me, there were things I didn't expect, I guess all the ugly stuffs made lucy stronger to face everything.

arigato for such lovely story.

Oh no - quit school?? Poor Lucy! I hope she'll be all right.
The church part was really beautiful. You know, I love your writing style - it's so clear!

I'm sorry, I did not even notice there was a new chapter up. I adore this version of the end, it makes more sense and is definitely more uplifting. Great job with this, I hope to see more from you soon!!

Aww . . . at other parts, you had me really crying! Then the last part was very good that it made me bawl all over once again. Very fine accomplishment, this is. I'll compile this to my archives because of its deftness in depicting what human nature can be.

Hello my friend,

I am so sorry that I have not updated and commented lately. *tear tear tear*. I have had play things and choir things and everything to do in school. I am so happy with how the story ended however. *heart heart*. I liked how it went from very depressing to very uplifting at times. The roller-coaster of emotions made me absolutly fall in love with your writing. I promise that I will write something soon my dear. LOVE YOU!

Lady Alera Van Hexis
Queen Regent of Darkness

Yet another well written chapter! I liked the fact that things are a lot better now for Lucy, she has had enough troubles for a whole lifetime. The only comment I can make is: you use the word 'quiet' a lot, when you mean 'quite'. And once, you've used 'blue' as the color, when you should've used 'blew' as the wind does, like you meant. Other than those few errors (which I can't blame you for at all, because my first language isn't English either), this is another amazing chapter!

A really great ending. It brought everything to a nice close, and it really was uplifting. I'm glad that everything turned out well in the end.

I hope, though, that it was not my previous review that caused you to end it. I really do enjoy reading your work (even the depressing bits), and I hope that someday you might do a sequel. Perhaps about Takashi and Lucy when they're older?

There were just a couple of things I'd like to point out.

"I felt ashamed for being unable to offer Takashi so little." This is a double negative. I think that you probably meant something more like 'I felt ashamed for being unable to offer Takashi any more.' or 'I felt ashamed that I could offer Takashi no more than that.'

Also, you twice more mention 'Maine', when it would probably make more sense for you to use the name of her hometown. ("Beautiful, small flakes of snow fell down over Maine." and "The snow continued to fall over Maine." Though it's possible that it was snowing all over Maine, it's unlikely.)

I'm glad that she isn't suddenly and without warning 'all better.' Takashi and her Mom help her out, and she’s seeing a physiologist, and she's gradually recovering. A much more realistic approach that I'm glad you took. So many writers of this kind of story seem to think that they can get away with having life suddenly and inexplicably better at the end, and that just doesn't work.

I really liked the last sentence, too. It's so cool that you have the story end with "the start of a new beginning." The ending is always the part that I struggle with most in my own writing, but you my friend have a gift.

Once again, thank you for writing and posting. I look forward to reading more from you soon.

*applauds* Hooray for Lucy, hooray for Lucy's mum, hooray for YOU, for such a satisfying ending! =)=)=)=)=)/5 on the Smile Meter for the story as a whole. Well done!
Smiles for you!
~Danielle=)

I couldn't review the other chapter again so i had to do it on this one.

okay, that is definitely more your style. I should have known you didn't mean it to be so short. personally I like the shorter chapter because I like it when it gives me room to imagine, but for your particular story, the longer chapter is probably better. And you did a good job tying everything together.
*applause* :)

That was much, much better! I was really beginning to wonder if you meant to make the chapter that short or if something was missing. Now that you posted the rest of the story, the ending was much better. You tied up everything very nicely and gave us an insight to Lucy and Takashi's relationship. Very well written and very well done.

Wow. Really short chapter! I'm really dissapointed that the story is over. I was really hoping to see where Lucy and Takashi's relationship was going to go, but I suppose all good things come to an end. Are you planning on writing a sequel? I think that would be awesome. It felt like there was a lot of things that were left unexplained so I was pretty surprised when you ended the story so soon, but it does leave a certain mystery to the piece and to what happens when you left it off where you did.
Its going to drive me crazy not knowing what happens between Takashi and Lucy and Lucy and her mother and the aftermath of what happened with her father and the less than happy "career" Lucy's mother has started to provide for Lucy and all that goes on with the lawyer and the court case.
So... if you are planning on writing a sequel, I look forward to reading it, and if you aren't, I understand too. :]
Great story, well written and well done. :D

I hope you didn't end your story just because of what someone said ina review...but if this is what you planned then..

yay! or..actually..boo it's over haha, I never know whether I'm happy or sad when I get done reading a book. actually this last chapter and the one before was probably the most emtionally well written chapter. I know that's probably not something you wanna hear from one your shortest chapter, but it was like, bam! an explostion of talent.

I'm glad her mom finally stepped up to the plate and took some action. makes sense though, with her husband gone.

anyway I'm going to shut up now. XD can't wait for the next chapter..oops nevermind. haha just kdding.