 Heaven Smile 2007-09-06 . chapter 1It's all very good, but the last stanza really made me laugh with entertainment.
Meaning I love how you just prey on the fact that he is Catholic and it's almost like you bathe in that frailty. In that almost bitter sweet irony.
But the line:
"We'll blame it on our combined loveless childhoods" was also a good view into how you can crave attention from anyone when you never had anyone to give attention to. I still really liked that line, though.
Nonetheless, you should be careful with this loving and flesh time bomb. He's a very ** up person to do the things you portray him as doing...
I love it. |
 beautiful. only tempermental 2007-01-23 . chapter 1This caught me from the first line. That's just a gripping image.
"You’re a ** up angel who lacks the acceptable anger management classes to be harmless enough to touch me, but tonight I could really care less." I love the flow of that and how there's a fondness in the tone, even though... well, it would normally be a bit freaky. Somehow this feels... right, the way you wrote it.
And I just love the last lines.
(I was going to say not that I'm into S&M or anything, like the other reviewer, just to make myself look good... but, to hell with it, I am. :P)
Beautiful work. |
 Ellin Louise 2007-01-02 . chapter 1The second to last verse is very powerful, I particulary the middle line of it. |
 Eboniccinderella 2006-11-22 . chapter 1I like this poem.I like the freedom of the form you wrote it in...and the type of love described.Not that I am S&M,just that your general,run of the mill Barbie loves Ken stuff is so boring. |
 Helena Evangelist 2006-11-22 . chapter 1I loved this, it really hit a chord for me. It's what I've been thinking about lately, in a strange sort of way...Anyway, good work. I liked the first section. |
 protection-to the top 2006-11-22 . chapter 1I like how this starts; the first line's very clever. I grinned at the ending, too. |
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