this is exquisite. I absolutely adore every single words that's written in here.

and this feels like the best of breakdowns that the poetgirls dream of.

and your word choice is stunning really. exsquisite as your metaphors. your last line screamed afterthought in all its italiced glory, it was pure genius.

i'd be insane not to favorite it

Oh, wow... I love this.

"and now we’re 96 seconds away from the breakdown" That line is just stunning. It's so orginal, so simple yet it just speaks to you. Eek. It's the shiver-y kind of good.

"held onto you like a dream and called you redemption but like all dreams, you melted into morning" That's beautiful. Just... it's beautiful.

And, of course, the ending is heartbreakingly perfect. Wow. I just love this. There's nothing else to say. I'm faving, of course.

you watched me get into the taxi in the pouring rain - reminds me of your ex-lover is dead by the stars. and i love your poetry...this is absolutely addictive and i have only read two poems of yours. nice work.

i didn't really like the hamartia bit. felt - elevated. unnatural. (unless it really happened.) but it was still beautiful. i should've known better than to read this now, 'cause i'm still in school atm & i feel like i'm about to cry. tie-in to your title was worse than perfect. & the tribute to "do not resusitate" or if that was just an accidental turn of phrase hit me. i love the flow to this. beautiful.

-kait

For the most part, I actually liked this, which is sort of rare. The topic is sort of cliche, but you used inventive phrases and (mostly) inventive word choices. I forsee, after a bit of maturing as a writer, becomming very good. You show a lot of potential.