FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
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| Dani P 2006-12-01 ch 1,  | abuseI liked the plot, you should continue it. However you had some grammatical errors such as "He took his green gloves" add the word 'off' after this phrase. Also work on your sentence structure, in some places it was a little off. The idea is great, but you could really improve your writing skills. Keep up the good work. |