 mostly water 2007-01-01 . chapter 1So many...so many, lord, I've been away from fictionpress from so long, what do you call them? You know. Those bloody empathic lines that just...capture so perfectly something you always thought was just a moment, a personal moment with your own mind and feelings. It's really nice to know that it isn't, and wasn't, and that a single overwhelming feeling will probably never be completely original or isolated.
The first stanza...every word. Oh, dear god. This brings me back. XD 'you proved that by never saying a word to me when i need(ed) you the most.' 'but darling, this is nothing compared to what i have already done for you.'.
I like a couple of lines from the second stanza especially: 'or are you too scared to face the facts?' (I mean, Jesus, own up to it, already) & 'and i poured out my despair to people that i barely know'. And of course - the last line. How insignificant individual adolescent pain is! Haven't we all already heard this before?
God, the third stanza is pretty. It's like beating your head against a brick wall, trying to TALK to someone who refuses to answer. 'i'll finally be over this and be over you' (what an interesting association) 'and even with real words, you give nothing but silence in return' 'and i have been numb for one week now.'
...sorry for this novel of a review. Just thought it might be nice. XD |
 Allerleirauh 2006-12-13 . chapter 1Your writing is very interesting. I wish I could say something clever or wry, or at least say something more, but I am afraid my well of pretty words is running dry tonight. My apologies, for this deserves a better review. |