I can totally relate to the last part with the PE teacher!! Once, we had a sub. that all the girls couldn't stop whispering about. lol.

I was hoping we'd get to see a Mission Impossible Style Break-in, but I guess that's next chapter? Bring it on! *pokes* I won't be happy until you've posted the entire thing ;D

1)The girls looked Bridget up and down as if to give her style tips on “What Not To Where (WEAR!!).”

2)Off he went down the stairs, stopping every so often to talk to random somebody’s (somebodies)

...ah your editor is getting lazy and must go sleep now, bye bye my little chicki

Hey Ms. Parker~

I really like your story. My favorite characters are Bridget, Troy, and John. Please let me know when you write more so I can read it! I can't wait to read the rest.

:D

Heyy Naomi its your editor =] I just have a few gramatical corrections for you...

1)As her parents pulled up to Elliot Preparatory School, Bridget could feel butterflies fluttering around in her stomach.

>>Maybe..."Bridget's mind raced with dozens of different ideas of what her new school life would have in store for her." OR
>>"An uneasy feeling arose within her, as if she were about to free fall off of a building in uptown New York."

2)In her opinion(,)!! they were trying to get rid of her and travel the world free of their teen’s problems.

3)Her parents recently quit their high-paid(PAYING)jobs and decided to retire early.

4)So when her parents told her to pack up her stuff and told her she was moving to California, (SHE)happily obliged.

5)From her view, the students looked normal(,) except (FOR THEIR) undeniable splash of style. Style meaning (OVERPRICED)clothes (AND) chichi designer labels.

6) (It was mandatory to check in first, and she turned to see several people waiting exactly where she should be). As she neared the desk she could see a middle aged woman working.

Very cool story!! I hope you update it soon! I think the line breaks accidentally got deleted, because the last paragraph of chapter 3 was unusually long... but FP gets messed up sometimes. I wasn't sure if you were emphasizing John's attempts to be smooth (and thus failings) by spelling "Enchanté" like "Ah-shan-te" but I totally thought of the singer-person first. lol.
The cliffhanger is killing me, I want to see how they try and go all "Mission Impossible" to get into her room, lol. Very fun story to read, can't wait to see how it progresses!