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| Zamos 2008-05-06 ch 3, anon. | abuseOh, wow...! This is a wonderful and captivating start to a book. I dont think I've ever come across a story I'd love to read more. I cant wait to see what your plans are for this. |
| TehRyder 2007-07-30 ch 1, | abuseAn interesting beginning. However, there are some parts of the story that just rub me the wrong way. First, what's with the present-tense? It seems weird. That could just be me, though. Second, this entire scene reminds me of a scene in Star Trek: First Contact wherein the medical staff are taking a woman from the past (Or, in this scene, Jeff) who has no clue what's going on through the Jefferies tubes (jeftun) and escaping from the Borg (Tos-Loven). I mean, it seems almost like plagarism. The Tos-Loven even act like the Borg in their quest for perfection and their ways of attaching organic with synthetic. You do have some very interesting back-stories and a rich history to draw from, if your other postings on the "Isle of Dreams" show how you've developed it. I also appreciate the lack of spelling and grammar errors. |