this is vry good. i love it.
Some bits were a little vauge... but all in all very good!

Aww that was sweet yet sad. Great story. A bit more detail here and there would make it better. Other than that it was good!!

Wow, I really enjoyed reading this. The shifts from past to present were really effective. My only thing is that there are some typos in the text. But nothing that affects my comprehension of the story overall.