Cool...the beginning reminded me alot of the style I used for DCF. This actually is pretty funny, in a more sarcastic, strange way. For a guy who's so commited to killing himself, he's actually very upbeat about everything.

(I was going to find the perfect suicide!)

The weirdest part is...it's not weird. He actually seems like a guy who wants to kill himself. One thing I would ask is why he wants to kill himself, and what's with him being locked up? If he doesn't have any friends at this point (which I'm pretty sure he doesn't) and his family's dead (at least his mom) then who found him in time to heal him and send him to the loony bin? Ah well.

I'll keep reading this, it's a lot better (in my humble opinion) than some of the 'omigawdworldendingletsalljustdie!' stuff you usually put up, even though it looks much the same at first. Keep up the good work!

Ja Ne,

KPC

(Hey, it rhymes!)

Hm, an interesting start~

I've been needing to read a spot of humor lately, actually. Though, I have to admit that at first, I was kind of hesitant, questioning whether the whole suicide and comedy parts would go together. As in, I was wondering if it would be distasteful or mocking. So far, it doesn't seem that way. I'm actually rather interested to see how this pans out.

Oh, and you might want to revise these two chapters a bit. I found a few spelling and grammatical mistakes here and there, but nothing major. :3

- Higeki

Okay, I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt and tried reading this story but it seems i was right in the first place. You are just a sad little emo kid who likes to write stories. Let me state something for you...

SUICIDE IS NOT FUNNY

Come on! How do you expect to write a comedy about suicide? Are you really that dense? Just becauser you cut yourself and wear girl clothes and dye your hair doesnt mean you know more about death and depression than anyone else. Quit being emo and write something good.

Signed,
xNatex

I oddly didn't find it difficult reading. I kinda figured a suicidal story would be bad... WEll I've been down this path I guess, I've been to the crazy house before, it was no fun... BUt this story was good. It was a very easy read compared to Espoir and Wrenches in Gears. Nice work.

Peace, Love, Triangle

~Darket

Hey! You reviewed my story, and I decided to return your request by reading one of yours. ^^
I think the best part of this is the realness of it. I've always been against suicide, and although I still am, my beliefs seem to waver a bit under the seriously real description from the eyes of an actual person.
A good key point I think you really put through was that depressed people don't neccessarily want to /die/, they just want to end their suffering, and death happens to be the only possible way they can do this.
A very good preface, I can't wait for Ch. 1!

Very cool. A lot of feeling in this so far. This was almost flawless, I'd say. Well written. I did find a few minor flaws. I normally don't point out typos and such, but in an intro this short, they stand out just a little more than usual.

'The sweat beading my started to trickle...' I think you're missing a word between 'my' and 'started'.

'staring up at the cieling as a new sound filled my head' You mispelled ceiling.

So other than those, I didn't find anything wrong with this. Good start to the story. I have high hopes for it.