This is great! Might need a comma after "bright" in the first line, and the second-to-last line in the third stanza, but I love the theme of this poem and it has a great flow!

I like it. Simple and to the point, It didn't exactly rhyme but it still flowed when reading. Lots of feeling and emotion could be felt in this, felt like it was straight from the heart. I hope to see more for you.

This is truly beautiful. I feel the same way about some of my friends. I like the care and love expressed in your poem, and the fact that the speaker points their friend to God in the first place.

Very spiritual and many god-references.

Hm it's cheerful though, which is good.

It's always good to have hope.

Anyhow. Cheers.

This was sweet...and well written. It didn't have a lot of rhythm to it (poetry and rhythm are inseparable in my mind), but it was a good start. Keep writing!

I really enjoyed reading this. It spoke to me alot. Its a very deep and honest poem and i find it hard to believe its your first attempt!

I love the simplistic beauty of this peice. For a first attempt I definately got to say, you got talent! Please keep up the great work!

Happy Writing

PottersSweetie17

Hey Dom, this is great! Good theme... solid content. I would say more about the technical end of things if I had any idea what I was talking about. Haha! Well, keep it up! I'm looking forward to the release of your big project (sometime in the next couple of years!).

Quite a good first attempt. Welcome to the world of poetry... I can already imagine challenging you to write some of those instead of the stories we've been working on :P I'll just do what I did with one of my friends and start talking in rhyme... hehehe

The poem is very open and honest... which I like. I like open poems, they're just easier to understand and relate to.

Hope this won't be the last we see of your poetry.