FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Silent Will 2007-01-26 ch 6,   | Well, I'll say the story certainly seems to be getting a lot darker now (You know, with the blood sucking and the stronger language and all that) The pacing is pretty good, but as always, everything's a bit clumped and the description is a little lacking. But the plot is definitely picking up, which is good. Keep it up. |
| Silent Will 2007-01-26 ch 4, | The story seems to be picking up a little and it's pretty good so far. But like other chapters, more description would be nice and it'd be MUCH less confusing if you started a new paragraph every time someone talks instead of making one bit of conversation an entire paragraph. But other than that, good work. Keep it up. |
| Silent Will 2007-01-26 ch 2, | So far I like where this is going. The plot so far itself is pretty good up to what I've read so far (Chapter 2) and it sounds like you have a pretty good idea about what's going to happen. There were a few minor problems like indenting every time someone else starts talking, and more description could have been used. But aside from those, this sounds good so far. Keep up the good work. |
| Sonyashinto 2007-01-23 ch 5, | Hey there, you wrote 3 chapters. thats really nice, and the first 2 chapter seemed a bit long, thats good, try and make them long. the dialog need some work, you need to separate who saying them in different paragraphs, like one person says something, and you make another paragraph and make person2 say something. do you get what im saying? besides that im like how the story is going, update soon. Ja-Ne =^_^= |
| Point Zero 2007-01-12 ch 2, | The chaps are a little short, and the dialouge meshes together a lot. Oh and thanx for reviewing my Chaps on "The binding Ballad" |
| Sonyashinto 2007-01-11 ch 2, | Hm...I'm getting interested more, but its still fuzzy. and even though you did make this chapter a little longer then your last, it is better to read storys that are more then 1 or 2 pages, having more to read keeps the viewers wanting more and satisfied. Plus if you do write more you are aloud the excuse that the next chapter will be late. so update soon, make the next chapter at least 2-3 pages, cause i wanna read this story but having soon little makes me wanna skip it . update soon. Ja-Ne =^_^= |
| SilveredScales 2007-01-09 ch 2, | Interesting. this is going really well. layers of intruige. But I can't read anymore right now: I have to get to work. Well written!! I'll be back to read this! |
| Sonyashinto 2007-01-08 ch 1, | This story sounds really interesting. I can't wait for the next chapter. Please update this story soon. Ohh and please make the chapters longer. Thanks. Ja-Ne =^_^= |